Signs you may be dating an alcoholic

There’s a merry-go-round quality about the systems and functions and habits that occur in an alcoholic home.

Soon enough, that merry-go-round becomes a hamster wheel and even after you’ve grown up and moved out, you still run races you’ll never win.

This laid-back Malibu beachfront rehab charts a holistic path to recovery, which suits the twenty- and thirtysomethings who come here—you just might have to clock a few extra miles on the sand to burn off Chef Monte’s hearty home-cooking.

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After attending a 12-step program for several years, my ex used to say that I had such a handle on the alcoholic mind that I knew how to “drive” an alcoholic. but I get how to maneuver the car and can even keep four wheels between two lines along those steep corners. If I had the choice to do it all again, I can’t say for certain if I would choose to date alcoholics the way I have.

I know that while dating them, losing fights with them, and being heartbroken by them, and in the midst of that hole dug so deep and so dark and filled with so much sorrow I would say “no.” But, once the light shines in, our memories cloud.

) covering relevant topics in a non-judgmental way: love, sex, motherhood, drug addiction & recovery, self-worth, body image, feminism, sexual orientation and activism.

Le Montre openly shares about her past as a sex and drug addict and how she overcame both to become a monogamous drug-free mom.

My gift is not in knowing how to understand or even “drive” an alcoholic.

It’s in the fact that I’ve made peace with my love for people who, in their fallibility, and in their miraculous recovery, have taught me more than any other kind of person.

But because alcohol is such a large part of our culture, it’s not always easy to identify when drinking has become a serious problem – one that requires treatment and total abstinence from substances of all kinds.

Growing up in a home with an alcoholic parent is a unique kind of rough.

And ache for a love deep down in the recesses of your being–in that unfillable void–that you’ll do anything to feel OK and thus you reach out for stuff: people, food, money, status, drugs, anything. When I was 18, I moved in with an alcoholic/addict who was verbally abusive and a perpetual cheat.

He convinced me I was special and different and I was so desperate to get out of my house, that I shacked up with him and his mother in a two-bedroom apartment in Canoga Park.

He was the first alcoholic man, in a string of men and women, who would fill my dating diary. For better or for worse, there is a comfort and familiarity in the inner workings of an alcoholic that doesn’t exist with others. • Alcoholics feel constantly criticized and fear being controlled.• Don’t try to boss around an alcoholic.• You can’t make somebody stop drinking. (Read that several times if you need to.)• Your phone calls/texts/emails will go unanswered, unreturned and ignored if an alcoholic is overwhelmed, overworked or feels unappreciated.• If an alcoholic cannot handle the topic of conversation, they will ignore it (and you).• Alcoholics tend to be self-centered and self-obsessed and immature.• Their egos are strong.

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